The party gets presented to Countess Matilda who is coddling the harpy children. The children hiss and spit at the party, before getting taken away to their gilded cage. Don Hector introduces himself as the Clinician of Pain. Countess Mailda explains how her darling children found a cursed bauble in the old hedge maze and it woke the evil crows and transformed her kids into harpies. Won’t Don Hector, the Clinician of Pain, and his brave companions do something?

Don Hector says they will. Nico is skeptical. Ha’Des examines the bauble and determines it’s a fae relic. Nico asks questions about the maze* and learns it’s mostly harmless but has been weird lately. Things shift unexpectedly in the place now, and there are strange sights. Nico mutters “great” and without further ado the party gets escorted to the maze where they’re told to return the bauble.

But right as they set off, there’s the sound of breaking glass as the harpy children break free from the house.

I ran the maze with a delving deeper sort of mechanic (like in the Stygian Library book). Each player made a test to see if they made progress. Meanwhile, each failed test triggered an encounter. Some were weird locations, some were attacks from the crows or the harpy kids, others were shifts in the fabric of reality.

One location was a statue depicting a devil torturing a jester, and the devil looked a bit like Ha’Des. At another statue the party saw something glowing and investigated. Nico climbed to the top and found a marionette baby** sleeping in a bowl carried by the statue. But before he can do anything the crows appear. They attack. Nico does some damage but gets the worst of it. The party flees. Nico tells Don Hector what he saw in the bowl. Don Hector returns for the baby. The party follows. They get the baby just as the crows return. Violence occurs. The party flees deeper into the maze, Nicolo badly injured and out of fuel for his firelance***. The harpy kids reappear hauling a large bucket of manure between them.

Bombs away!

Don Hector and Ha’Des get splattered in shit. (Laundry mechanic!) The party presses on. At last they reach the maze’s center where they know the kids found the bauble. There’s a crypt there half overgrown by a rose bush, but the door is open and only void is visible in the crypt. The party quickly concocts a plan to lure the crows into the crypt: Ha’Des will be bait, Don Hector will slam the door, and Nico will seal it by replacing the bauble.

The crows appear, the harpies following. There’s a round of chaos, then a round of perfect rolling. The plan works. The crows are sealed in the crypt. The harpies fly off in clumsy formation. The party heads back to the countess to say they have solved the problem. The guards take the party to a suite of rooms, and the next hours pass tensely with the party realizing their fates are tied to the harpy kids’ fates. Also, Don Hector proudly declares that he’s keeping his baby.

Morning comes. The kids are sick but no longer harpies. The guards are less hostile to the party. Don Hector demands a bath.

The party sets in to rest, but as they eat lunch a herald arrives. She is from Testaccio and wants to escort Don Hector and his entourage there as guests of the local lord.

Turns out the lord has a dinner planned, but one of the guests couldn’t attend and the herald was sent to find a noble to fill in the empty spot. By chance she found Don Hector and was happy to hear from Countess Matilda that he was a true hero. The party gets in the waiting coach and sets off at speed for Testaccio. On the way they learn some rumors from the herald:

• Count Chico was the guest who couldn’t attend the dinner due to his injuries.
• Count Chico is arranged to marry their host’s daughter.
• The ogres control the forest north of Testaccio and make travel over the mountain difficult. The local lord is hoping to hire someone to get rid of them.

The coach arrives in Testaccio as night falls. The herald goes forth to announce the party, introducing them as Don Hector, the Clinician of Pain, his jester, Ha’Des, and musical dogsbody, Nicolo. The party enters the manor house.

Next adventure: Don Hector’s Dance Party!****

* The hedge maze was the Garden of Bomarzo.

** One of those random encounters where you’re tempted to reroll because babies can derail campaigns, but I didn’t and so the party has a baby marionette… for now.

*** Nico has two devices: a firelance and a music box that puts people to sleep. These got reimagined into a fire-spewing, sleep-inducing hurdy-gurdy.

**** Don Hector’s failed dex checks were legendary, so we joked about them as Don Hector’s Dance Party, and that’s where the next adventure’s idea came from.